Last night as we sat and watched TV, you know waiting for the ball to drop, G asked me what I thought of 2009 and if I was happy to see it go. I had to think about it for a moment. 2009 was tough --- very tough - but when I sat and thought about it, I realized it was not as bad for ME as it was for G. For me I think 2008 was the worse. Besides AJ being born it was a yucky year. I can see it in the pictures I took, which were hardly any, and I just remember me being and feeling awful all of the time. I was angry, depressed and miserable. I hated that year. As for G with his unemployment for most of the year, his grieving over the loss of his restaurant, family issues with his brother, our financial struggles and lastly, the passing of his father, 2009 was his worse year.
G and I do agree that 2009 was rough, mainly financially, but for me it was so much more peaceful than 2008. Coming out of 2008 I made a promise to myself that I would not dwell in the misery of what life brought to me on a particular day and I think I've done a pretty good job at sticking to it. I've reconnected with my Faith and it's been incredible. I live everyday in Faith and it keeps me strong and positive. Yes, things may look bleek at one given moment but there's something in me now that just knows things will be ok. It's very peaceful and it keeps me smiling every day. I think I did a good job of "living in the moment" every day or at least most of the time. I definitely can see the difference in the pictures I took this year :)
2009 was a year of an awakening and understanding but also a year of growth for me both spiritually and emotionally. I believe I was a better mother to my kids and a better wife to my husband. And although I am happy to say goodbye to 2009 and all of it's roughness, I am thankful for what it has helped me become.
Happy New Years!
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