Cloud Nine

Cloud nine....this is where I've been floating around ever since I got the surprise job opportunity. Don't get me wrong...it was hectic between trying to play catch up from being snowed in, having double workloads and literally doing last minute Christmas shopping....but I was on cloud nine the whole time.

We had a GREAT Christmas. The kids got a perfect Christmas...and not just in gifts. In every which way. Even G and I had fun with our little Christmas budget we had for each other. As I'm sure many parents agree, the real gifts are seeing your kids so happy. As G and I laid in bed Christmas Eve we both talked about how excited we were about Seena opening up her presents. AJ is still too young to understand but we figured he would enjoy the simple act of just opening presents (which he did!). Even Teen, with her simple wish list of gift cards, was going to be surprised with her gifts under the tree.

I don't know how else to say it but it really was a great Christmas. Nothing bothered me. Not the crazy lines, not the late night wrapping gifts, not the traffic, not the out-of-the-way shopping trips to get "the gift"... none of it. I was just so thankful and happy that I was actually able to do it. Merry Christmas!

The Roller Coaster of My Life

I was originally going to title this as Christmas Miracle but I decided to change it to Roller Coaster of My Life because that is what my life is. I know this is true for everyone else too but it's amazing to me. These last few years has been nothing but a ride on a speeding roller coaster and not always a joy ride. We've had our highs and we've had our lows...I think I'm ready to step off and just enjoy a lazy river for a while.

Anyway, this week has been a roller coaster for us. With G still not starting work and with his dad's untimely death we've been wiped out financially. Both G and I sat the kids down and explained that X-mas was going to be EXTREMELY light this year. Teen was easier obviously but Seena is 5. She believes in Santa Clause so trying to explain why Santa Clause may not bring as many presents was a little tougher. Later that evening Seena approached me and said the following:

"mommy, I've been doing some thinking. I'm not going to make Santa give me everything I want. I already have a lot of toys and I know there are kids out there that don't have as much as me. It's ok. I can wait until next Christmas."

I know this should make me proud...and I am, don't get me wrong, but this broke my heart. All I could do was scoop her up, bury my head in her shoulders and cried, "I'm sory, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." I did manage to tell her how wonderful she was for saying that and that both God and Santa were listening. This was my low.

The next day, I got my Christmas miracle. Out of the blue I get a call for an opportunity for extra income, work required obviously, but it didn't matter, it was enough and more! I've always been told to just have faith and that God will always give you what you need. Bless him, bless him, bless him....He has given me a miracle. If all goes well G and I will be hitting the stores this weekend and in crazy, last minute shopping bliss! This was my high.

And just like that we hit another low that brought us back down to reality. The box arrived. Yes, The Box. Neither of us knew what to expect and G took his time. It was very sad and a little surreal; in his hands G held what was left of his beloved father. And for me, it wasn't freaky or creepy, it was actually comforting. It was nice knowing that we still had Papu with us. I know G is hurting all over again so I say this last prayer and goodbye for both G and I:

Papu, may you rest in peace in the Kingdom of Heaven and may you be comforted in knowing that you have finally made it to where you've always wanted to be...at home with your boys and family. We love you and miss you.

A Little Holiday Sugar Rush

What's more fun than spending an afternoon tempting little kiddies with candy they can't eat :) Just kidding!! Seena and AJ did pretty well actually. I thought for sure I would be constantly taking candy out of AJ's mouth....maybe it was the choice of candies in the Gingerbread House kit? Either way, we spent Saturday decorating a gingerbread house and baking chocoloate chip cookies...mmmm.

Seena, Juno Mom, AJ and Teen

Sneaky Siblings

This is how I found my two little candy canes after I put them to bed in their separate rooms.

This is how I found them a little later that evening. :)

Friday Night Leftovers

As of this moment I can't remember or figure out how the leftover button thingy works. So for now:

FRIDAY NIGHT LEFTOVERS

• Seena does not like raisins however she'll eat them on peanut butter filled celery. She refers to this as "her favorite recipe"
• Just this week I realized that AJ's 2nd b-day is literally around the corner and I have made no plans. As of right now I can't decide between it being a Backyardigan's theme or a Farm Animal theme. Oh, and I made up the guest list. That is as far as I've gotten, not good.
• Meanwhile, today we celebrated Seena's 1/2 b-day at school. It was actually very sweet. We (G and I) took cupcakes to school and then we read her favorite book to the class.
• Today, for the 1st time in my life, I went to Confession. ...and I confessed it all...every little bit. I have no secrets. I do feel better and I hope this "cleansing of my soul" will help me feel less angry all of the time.
• I'm amazed every day by what Seena is learning. This week she talked to me about magnets, making self portraits and doing Dance Revolution in PE.
• AJ has started the oddest and annoying habit. He chews up his food and then spits it out. I sat and watched him go through almost an entire package of cherry tomatoes that way.

One Diaper

I'm the type of person that when I run errands or have to go places, I like to map them out in a very specific order so that I 1) don't waste time 2) don't have to backtrack and 3) don't have to lug any kids in and out of a car numerous times. I'm also one of those people that gets very anxious, annoyed, frustrated if things don't go as planned. I do not like to stray from the order of events. I just don't do well with that. So, with that said I had a specific agenda yesterday...

Seena to school....take AJ to get 2nd and final H1N1 shot...drop off AJ at daycare...go to work to input case in computer...go to Super Target...finish work at home...ship completed case to agency...pick up kids and go to Nanas. Simple. Instead, the earlier part of my day went like this...

Seena to school...no problem
Drove by health clinic where free shots were being given. As I pulled up it seemed way too busy and I decided I would come back later. This is still ok with me because my "route" would not be affected as I could simply hit the clinic on my way back from work. To take AJ to daycare and then go to work would mean I would have to backtrack twice - once to get him back to daycare and then to pick him up and take him BACK to the clinic. That scenario was totally not acceptable.

Brilliant, right? I thought so too until I was just a few minutes away from work when I realized that I had no diapers, no wipes and AJ had not had his morning poo yet. Now, a smart mom or person, for that matter, would just go to the store and get diapers. Not me. Nope, this side trip did not fit into the route and/or order of events. In order for me to get diapers, I HAD to go to Target and it had to be a Super Target because 1) I had coupons for diapers and 2) I needed to get some groceries that I only had specific target coupons for. So, I really couldn't just stop ANYWHERE to get diapers....really, I couldn't.

So, I began to pray and send God all of my good thoughts to please, please let AJ hold out on his one diaper.

Well, God apparently is still enjoying playing jokes and naturally, AJ had a poopy diaper within 10 minutes of being at work. I had at least another 45 minutes of work to do before I could leave. Awesome.

After getting him cleaned up, I brought him back into my office. Thankfully, I have my own private office with no windows and that I can lock. And yes, I did the unthinkable. I let my white trash ways out and I let my son run around my office without any pants on. I tried to be clever and I set out boxes and trash cans and told AJ to use them as potties. How I wish I had a camera with me...AJ went from box to box, sitting in them and saying pee pee in each one. That lasted maybe 6-7 minutes.

Meanwhile my anxiety grew.

At sometime my good conscience came through and I began to try to find something that I could use for a temporary diaper.

My first attempt was bubble wrap. Mmhmm, bubble wrap.

That was immediately rejected.

Next, was AJ's jacket. It was lined on the inside and windbreaker like on the outside. I stuck his feet in the arms and pulled the jacket up all the way up as far as it could go up. Then I secured it by wrapping packing tape around him like a little mini mummy. Brilliant! Score!

... until I realized I went down too far and wrapped some of AJ's thighs together. Poor thing was trying to walk around but just couldn't. Goodness, I wish I had a camera!! And of course I let him stay that way. What is wrong with me?!!?

Miraculously I made it through work without any incidences AND we even made it to Target to get diapers. AND even better, there was no line and no wait at the health clinic.

And yes, I did take him out of his mummy-diaper outfit before we left work, I'm not that bad!

Quiet

Things have been quiet around here lately, mainly from all that has happened. Last week G was dealing with issues regarding his brother and then over the weekend his father died. Papu died of a heart attack and it was sudden and unexpected.

This is the first close family member death for the both of us. I, unfortunately, did not know Papu (Greek for grandfather) very well. I've only met him twice. He lived in Florida and he came to visit us one summer and we saw him in Ft. Lauderdale the night before we were leaving for the cruise. I am saddened by this because in the beginning I misjudged Papu. I did not think highly of him but as the years went by I realized that I just didn't understand the nature of the relationship G had with his dad. Through the years I've heard great stories from both G and Ya Ya. Stories of a man who was an incredible chess player, a man who loved cars and painting them, a man who was as strong as an ox and of a man who loved his family and kids very much. There are two particular stories that I hear repeatedly from Ya Ya and each time I pretend that it's the first time I've heard it. The first is when Ya Ya was pregnant. One particular night she craved watermelon in the middle of the night and Papu went out and got if for her....when he got back she only had one bite. The other is that Sunday's were the days that Ya Ya got to sleep in. Papu would grab the boys early in the morning and take them out so Ya Ya could sleep in.....hmmmm, I wish this was something that passed down to G ;)

Seena has also only met Papu twice and she does remember him from the night we saw him in Ft. Lauderdale. I think for her, however, it was harder to see her daddy so upset. I know I have a picture of Papu and Seena together, I just don't know where it is.

G is slowly coming out of his somber haze, each day being a little easier than the one before. G has taken on the official role of the man of the family now and took on the responsibility of handling all of the funeral arrangements. Ya Ya and G chose to have Papu cremated and his ashes sent here. I can't even imagine what that will be like...for the FedEx or UPS man it will just be another box, for G it will be well....so much more.

Sleeping

G always jokes around that I can sleep anywhere, even standing up. I think I've passed this on to my kids....

Didn't even make it into the bouncy seat (not a wet spot)

My ultimate favorite....this was in the morning while AJ waited for Seena and I to get back from church.